Yesterday, I was discussing the problems of newlyweds with my seminarian friend. Don’t ask me why, we just were. He said that many new brides complain that their husbands want to have sex much more often than they want to. One of his classes at seminary this year was on marriage and family (to prepare them for the counseling they will have to do as priests) and so he knew a good deal about this apparently widespread issue. He said that in order to avoid this problem, the husband needed to take care of his wife’s emotional needs both throughout the day and during sex, that way she would want to enter into the nuptial act with him willingly. This made sense to me since I know that women are more emotionally oriented than physically oriented, and when our emotional needs are not satisfied, we are not very willing to indulge men in anything else.
Coincidentally, today at mass, Fr. Hart told us in the homily that the celebration of the Eucharist was a nuptial act. At first I was taken aback. No way, I said in my head. Mass cannot be like sex. But then he explained.
Christ is the bridegroom to his bride the church. Sex is the most intimate giving of self that two people can engage in. That is what the sacrifice of the Eucharist is. Christ intimately giving himself to us, his bride the church. That is what a sacrifice is, a total giving of self for another.
As I thought about it more and more, I realized how the more I pray and the more I grow in my spiritual relationship with Christ, the more I enjoy going to mass. As I come to rely more on his guidance and love, I accept his invitation to the mass more and more often. Even when I am at mass, God’s love for me overflows in every aspect of its celebration, and I feel taken care of. Christ offers himself to me in the mass every day, and I have no problem accepting joyfully because, just like a good newlywed husband, he takes care of my emotional needs throughout the day and during this most holy of nuptial acts.
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